Editing Fairy Tales for Your Kids

Originally published on BabyCenter.com August 9, 2013

“More book?” is the boy’s rallying cry at bedtime. He knows it’s hard for us to say “no” to him wanting to read.

Sometimes, we read until he falls asleep. Sometimes we leave him with a book in his crib and let him look at the pictures until he finally shuts his eyes. And sometimes he wakes up screaming at 3:30 in the morning and only a story will calm him down.

It’s on those nights when the whole family is sleep deprived and I don’t want to risk turning on a light that I turn to the stories I know by heart – the simple fairy tales that almost all of us hear at one point or another in our childhoods.

And it’s usually in the middle of reciting these tried and true fairy tales that I realize how badly they need editing.

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Magic in Greystone Valley

Greystone Valley is a world where the myths and legends of our world run wild. That means that magic is abundant in this world, with different people wielding different kinds of sorcery. Some people in the valley have even tried studying magic like it’s math or science, gathering together in schools to discuss theories on different spells. These studies tend to be frustrating because magic is an ever-changing art form. While there are many different ways for a person to learn this art in Greystone Valley, these are the three most common forms of magic.

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Comics & Quests: Death and the Dragon’s Eye

It’s no secret that I really like Kyriani, especially after her makeover during “The Ostus Legacy.” Once she combined her “good” and “evil” halves, she became confident, charming, and clever. Her flirtatious ways, usually avoided in 1990s fantasy heroines, are something she has no shame over but do not define her character. So I should be very happy that she gets a story arc focused on her, especially since she’s been mostly a side character since “The Ostus Legacy.”

I should be happy…so am I?

Well, let’s dive into “Death and the Dragon’s Eye” to see if Kyri gets the treatment I think she deserves.

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The Merits of Being a Moderately Competent Dad

Originally published May 10, 2013 on BabyCenter.com

As Mother’s Day approaches, I’m reminded that it’s good to be a moderately competent dad.

My wife is a stay at home mom, so she does everything. To prevent her from completely melting down, I sometimes start the weekend with a grocery run or shopping expedition that’s just me and my son. I call it merrands. That’s short for “man errands.” I’m clever like that.

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Moms and Depression: Help is More Effective than you Think

Originally published on BabyCenter.com July 4, 2013

It’s only been about a month since I blogged about depression, but as with most mental illnesses it’s a topic that needs to be revisited frequently. In this case, Lisa Firestone recently provided a reminder in the Huffington Post that depression is a major problem that moms face. It’s a good reminder not only because there are many moms who know that they will have to deal with depression before and after pregnancy, but also because there are many expectant moms who don’t realize that they are already dealing with it.

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Greystone Valley: Dwarves

“Believe me, if there was a better way to approach without being seen, we would take it,” Dax responded. “I hate those tunnels—they’re so dank and dreary. The moisture and cold air will almost certainly make my rheumatism act up. But Castle Greystone is surrounded by trackless foothills and thick forests. The southern pass is our best hope of getting to the Great City. The caverns are dark and deep, but they’ll bring us right beneath the city, although I’m sure we’ll all perish before we’re through.”

“So, what will we be facing down there?” Sarah’s mom asked. “Dragons? Trolls?”

“Worse,” Dax said. “Dwarves.”

“Dwarves?” Sarah asked. “Like short people?”

“Short, hairless people that live in the deepest caverns and . . . ugh . . . sing sometimes.”

“They don’t sound that bad.”

Dax scanned the horizon and took the lead as they got going. “Sometimes,” he moaned, “it seems like everybody else is speaking in a foreign language.”

Not quite fey but not quite humans, the dwarves of Greystone Valley inhabit the darkest depths of the mountains. They are fierce protectors of the treasures that lie beneath the earth, and often fight dragons and trolls, whose greed drives the dwarves into a frenzy.

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Wonder Woman in No Man’s Land: Anatomy of a Great Scene

Originally posted on Panic in the Skies January 23, 2018

For all its misses, the DC Extended Universe has mustered up a single film that took over the box office while also receiving strong praise from critics. Wonder Woman stands out at the only unqualified success from DC’s cinematic universe so far. It also provided one of the best scenes in any superhero movie.

I’m referring, of course, to the No Man’s Land scene, which nearly got cut from the film. Luckily, director Patty Jenkins won the argument and kept the scene in the final cut despite the fact that Wonder Woman wasn’t fighting a villain. It’s an iconic moment, and the film builds up to it incredibly well.

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Kings and Queens of Greystone Valley

“Why don’t they raise the army anyway?” Sarah stepped carefully through the streets, avoiding sharp rocks that could cut into her bare feet. “These people can’t enjoy having an entire army tromping through their village at the drop of a hat.”

“What land do you come from?”

“Me? Um…America.”

“And does everyone get along in this America of yours?”

“Of course!” Sarah immediately felt foolish for blurting out the poorly thought-out answer. “Well…not really. It’s complicated.”

“It’s complicated here, too. The valley hasn’t had a king in over fifty years. It’s mostly just tiny villages like this one. Each town has its own way of doing things, and none of them likes having someone else telling them what to do. When people can’t even agree on what side of bread to butter in the morning, how are they supposed to cooperate on something more important?”

Greystone Valley is currently a land without a ruler. The valley is made up mostly of villages and other small settlements, each which has their own way of doing things. That means that going from one town to the next has some peril involved, since the laws might change dramatically without notice. Very few towns post their laws openly. Most people assume that their way of doing things is just common sense, even if it doesn’t seem like common sense to a foreigner. It has been this way for over fifty years now, ever since the corrupt reign of King Borgus Rothgar, often referred to nowadays as Rothgar the Fat, Stupid, and Ugly.

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